Tag Archives: counsel

abuse, belief system, biblical divorce, children, Christianity, church denial, conflict, disrespect, divorce, domestic violence, emotional abuse, enabling, faith, fear, God's faithfulness, hypocrisy, leaving an abuser, marriage, religion, shame, trauma, wisdom

Wisdom in the Counsel of Many?

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“Without consultation, plans are frustrated, but with many counselors they succeed.”  Proverbs 15:22

We know there is wisdom in the counsel of many.  Even in the midst of overwhelming heartache and confusion, we may have some vague idea of what we want or need to do, but out of a sincere desire to do the right thing, we prefer to secure a measure of validation from others before we proceed.

Unfortunately, when dealing with an abusive spouse, some of our most well-meaning advisers may offer up various measures of godly-sounding legalism rather than the kind of balanced, practical support that the one living in the cross-hairs of an abuser desperately needs.

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abuse, biblical divorce, conflict, confusion, domestic violence, emotional abuse, faith, fear, religion

Reject the Counsel of the Doubters, for the Wicked Still Live Among Us

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 “Transgression speaks to the ungodly within his heart; there is no fear of God before his eyes.  For it flatters him in his own eyes concerning the discovery of his iniquity and the hatred of it.  The words of his mouth are wickedness and deceit; He has ceased to be wise and to do good. He plans wickedness upon his bed; He sets himself on a path that is not good; He does not despise evil.”  Psalm 36:1-4

Young Woman With Face In Hands.

During a conversation with a young woman outside a local church, she began to timidly open up about how terrified she was to go home.  Try as she might, she simply could not hold herself together.  She began to tremble, the tears began to flow, and her voice broke as she shared that she was praying for clarity with regard to her relationship with her admittedly abusive husband.  I listened intently and then said as gently as I could, “I think those tears are providing you with all the clarity you need.”  And as the truth slowly began to sink in, she wiped her eyes and nodded in solemn agreement.

I have no idea how long she had been carrying that heavy burden, but I found it tragically ironic when I discovered that she was employed at that church.  I had to wonder how many people in her circle had been aware of her torment and whether those same people told her all the things she “just” needed to do to minister to her wayward husband and save their marriage.

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