In my conversations with abuse victims, the above phrase is something I can typically expect to hear.
It begins with “He* really believes…” and ends with:
…his way is the right way.
…I’m the one with the problem.
…I don’t understand him.
…I should just trust him.
…he is justified in treating me the way he does.
…I’m a lousy wife.
Does he really believe those things? If he does, then to my way of thinking, there are only two options. Either: 1) he is painfully delusional, or 2) he is doing everything in his power to convince you that he believes those things of you.
Why would he do that?
Jesus said, “You have heard that the ancients were told, ‘You shall not commit murder’ and ‘Whoever commits murder shall be liable to the court.’ I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother shall be guilty before the court; and whoever says to his brother, “Raca” shall be guilty before the supreme court; and whoever says, ‘You fool,’ shall be guilty enough to go into the fiery hell…” Matthew 5:21-22